


you drew stars around my scars (but now i'm bleedin')

by connorswhisk



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: (and some other people writing letters in between), Epistolary, F/F, but mostly two sad women yearning and pining after one another and not knowing how to express it, gay people writing almost love letters, gay people writing letters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:41:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26982322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/connorswhisk/pseuds/connorswhisk
Summary: After Zaheer poisons her, Korra goes to heal in the South Pole, away from all of her friends, to gain some sense of self back again.These are a few of the letters she receives from the people she knows. Most of them are from a certain dark-haired Sato girl, with eyes like jade and lips the color of wine.Not that that means anything to Korra.
Relationships: Korra/Asami Sato
Comments: 4
Kudos: 50





	you drew stars around my scars (but now i'm bleedin')

**Author's Note:**

> korrasami was one of the first times i ever saw people like me onscreen, people who loved other people of the same gender and were happy in doing so, and they hold a very special place in my heart for that reason. this is my love letter to them, through their love letters to each other.
> 
> title taken from cardigan by taylor swift
> 
> for pix <3

_Dear Korra,_

_How are you doing? I know it’s sort of a silly question, but I wasn’t sure what else to ask. It’s just that I haven’t seen you since Jinora’s ceremony. I hope you’re feeling ok._

_I’m all right. At least, I think I am. There’s a lot to get done here in Republic City, after everything that happened. Tenzin is working hard with the airbenders. They’ve gotten a lot more recruits since Zaheer. Air Temple Island is absolutely teeming with people, I wish you could see it. Maybe you could show it to Aang, I’m not sure._

_Jinora is really an incredible airbender. You’d be so proud of her. I know her parents are._

_I’m working with Varrick and Zhu Li on Future Industries. Yeah, you heard that right. President Raiko_ _pardoned_ _them. I was as surprised as you are. At least, you’re probably surprised, right? I would be._

_I don’t get along super well with Varrick, considering that he, you know, ruined my company and stole all of my stuff. But he’s really smart, and we’re working on some new prototypes for things that I think will be really helpful around the world._

_You already know, I bet, but Zaofu is working hard to try and piece the Earth Kingdom back together again. Do you remember Kuvira? The captain of Su’s guard? She’s really good at metalbending, and she’s sort of starting to take the lead in the reunification efforts. She seems like she knows what she’s doing. I trust her. I think._

_Mako and Bolin are ok. Mako’s back on the police force, and I’m not exactly sure what Bolin is doing just yet, but he’s spending a lot of time with his family, and with Opal. Remember when he used to have a crush on_ _you?_ _Ha, well, he and Opal seem to be pretty solidly in love with each other. I’m glad. Opal’s really sweet, and Bolin deserves someone like that._

_I don’t mean that she’s nice and you’re not. Don’t worry, you’re still a sweetie in my book._

_Sometimes, I get a little lonely, though. Varrick and Zhu Li aren’t really my friends so much as they are my business partners. Mako and Bolin are around, but most days Mako is doing something for Chief Beifong, or Bolin is showing his family the city, or I’m busy at the company. We just don’t get a lot of time to hang out with each other anymore. Not like we used to._

_…I’m just now realizing how stupid this sounds. Why am I complaining to you about being lonely? Sorry, Korra, I wasn’t thinking. I would rewrite this letter, but I have to be at a dinner party in…right now, actually. Shit._

_Listen, it’s going to be ok. You’re the Avatar. You’re_ _Korra._ _You’re going to heal, and you’re going to bounce back stronger than ever, because that’s what you do. Ok? You are._

_I miss you. So much._

_\- Asami_

_Hey, Korra, it’s Mako._

_I’m sorry I haven’t been sending that many letters lately. I want to, but I’m super busy with work and stuff. I never really have the time._

_Um. I’m not totally sure what to say here. I guess I’ll just update you on the stuff that’s been going on in Republic City since the last time I wrote to you? I don’t know, I know Asami pretty much tells you everything, but maybe she missed some stuff, so I’ll tell you anyway. I hope that’s ok._

_So, working on the force has gotten a lot better than it was a few years back. I think Chief Beifong has really stepped up her game since she made up with her sister in Zaofu. It’s a lot of hard work, but it’s worth it. Crime’s at an all time low. Navigating the city is still a little hard with all the vines everywhere, but we make do. Not that I’m complaining about the vines! Or the spirit wilds. I think it’s good that they’re here. It’s just…different._

_I know you’re hearing all about the Earth Kingdom, and not just from Asami. Kuvira’s taking charge pretty effectively. I’m not sure what she’s like. I mean, I never knew her all that well before, but she seems like a good leader, I think. I don’t know, sometimes I hear Chief and the others talk…Bolin really likes her, though. He’s thinking of joining up with her, doing some good for the world. I’m…I’m really proud of Bolin for caring. I’m glad he’s my brother._

_Uh. Other than that? My family’s doing pretty well. Grandma says hi, by the way. She asks about you a lot. I think she’s still mad at me, though, for…because we broke up. But that’s her problem._

_Sorry, that probably sounded sort of rude. I love her, I just wish she’d mind her own business sometimes._

_I think that’s everything I can really say. Oh, yeah, they finally found an heir to the Earth Kingdom throne. His name is Prince Wu. I don’t know anything about him (we’ve never met), but let’s hope he knows what he’s doing._

_This letter’s kind of short. Sorry about that. I didn’t really have a lot to tell you._

_I hope I can find the time to write to you again soon. I don’t want to keep you waiting, right? Haha._

_Wish you were here so we could still pro-bend with each other._

_Your friend, Mako_

_Dear Korra,_

_I’ll make sure to tell everyone that your dad says hi. I’m glad to hear that he’s supporting you so much, like I always knew he would. He loves you. We all love you._

_Business is doing really well! Thanks for asking, I know you probably don’t_ _really_ _care all that much about Future Industries, but I’m excited. The company’s doing better than it ever has, even when my father was in charge. Varrick is Varrick, but he’s also a genius, so it kind of makes up for it._

_Mako was vague in his last letter? Yeah, that sounds like him. He’s never been a great communicator. But you know that._

_Kuvira is doing more and more for the Earth Kingdom every day. We’re…none of us is really sure if what she’s doing is_ _good_ _or not. The idea of helping the world come back together again is awesome, but she’s approaching it really aggressively. I think she has good ideas at heart, but she’s sort of…formidable. Suyin really doesn’t like her, especially since she’s dating Baatar Jr. now. I know, right? Baatar always seemed so…geeky? Not like that’s a bad thing or anything, I just never thought someone like_ _Kuvira_ _would go for him. Then again, I thought that you and Mako would never break up, and I was wrong about that._

_Anyway. I haven’t been to Air Temple Island in a while, but I’ve only heard good things about everything going on there. Everyone is always so busy, what with training and all, and new airbenders show up every month. It’s really cool._

_Sometimes, I eat lunch with Pema and Rohan, on slower days when I’m not doing much and neither is she. Rohan’s getting so big! It’s still too early to tell if he can bend or not, but Pema’s still holding out for having at least one non-bending kid._

_Pema says she’s going to send a care package for you, with the sticky buns you really like. So, be on the look out for that. I might add something to it from me, but I haven’t been able to think of anything good enough yet._

_In other news, I went with Mako the other night on a case. The Triple Threat Triads were running an illegal moonshine business out of this basement room that was underneath an abandoned warehouse. I’m not sure how they thought that would help, because we had Lin with us, and she sensed it out really quick. We got most of them, but a couple of them managed to escape. I only went with Mako because Varrick was at some fancy event that I wasn’t invited to, and I was feeling bored. It was actually pretty fun. Bolin wasn’t there, but it was almost like having Team Avatar back together again._

_But obviously it wouldn’t be Team Avatar without you. If you were there, I bet you anything those last few Triads wouldn’t have gotten away._

_I hope it isn’t weird, that I did that with Mako. I know he’s finally stopped being awkward around us when it comes to…everything. I just want you to know that I don’t have feelings for Mako anymore. I haven’t for a while. I know you know that, but I want to make sure that you do. We’re friends. Just like you and Mako are friends, and me and Bolin are friends, and you and Bolin are friends, and you and I…you and I are friends, too._

_Things are ok up here. But they would be so much better if you were here, too._

_\- Asami_

_P.S. I actually just had the perfect idea for what to put in your care package, but I’m not going to tell you, so it’ll have to be a surprise. XOXO_

_To My Dearest Friend, Avatar Korra,_

_Much time has passed since we last saw each other, and it feels like eons have gone by. There is not a moment of my life that I do not think of you, hoping you are well, and wishing you could be here to see Pabu because he really misses you._

_Ok, I tried the whole fancy thing, but I guess it didn’t really work out._

_Anyway, what’s up down there in the South Pole? How are your parents? How’s Katara? How’s Naga? Does she miss me? How’s your bending? How are you feeling? Do_ _you_ _miss me? (Just kidding, I know you do) (Right?) Have Eska and Desna come to visit you? Does Eska still talk about me? Not like I care, and I’m totally with Opal now, but I was just wondering._

_Sorry for all the questions. I guess I just have a lot of things to ask you. Also, sorry that this is the first letter I’ve sent you. I’ve been so busy with so many things that I never had time, but I finally did today, so here you go!_

_So, yeah, like I said before, I’m with Opal, and it’s going_ _great._ _She’s the nicest, most prettiest, awesomest girl I’ve ever met!_

_You’re nice and pretty and awesome, too, but I mean that in, like, a friend way. Not romantically at all. Platonically. Yeah._

_Opal and I both have a lot on our plates, what with family and mastering airbending and working on lavabending (for me, obviously. But wouldn’t it be cool if she could lavabend, too???), but we still try and go out every week or so. I’ve shown her all around the city! I’ve taken her to all my favorite noodle restaurants, and she’s seen all my movers, and last night, I took her to her very first pro-bending match! She told me that she wants to ask Tenzin about seeing if the airbenders could start joining teams! Wouldn’t that be awesome? If we ever decide to bring back the Fire Ferrets, Opal should definitely be our air girl._

_I think Mako already told you, but Grandma says hi! She really seems to like you. The rest of our family is doing pretty well with adjusting to Republic City life. Grandma sometimes still gets all teary-eyed if somebody brings up the Earth Queen, but other than that, she seems ok. I’m so, so, so, so, so happy we found them in Ba Sing Se, and I’m also really happy that we got them out of there._

_Speaking of the Earth Kingdom, I’ve decided to join Kuvira’s forces. She and Baatar Jr. are working so hard to fix everything, and I thought, if the Red Lotus took my family’s home away, then I should give it back to them, right? Varrick and I are supposed to leave the city in a week, and then we’ll be all over the world helping people! Can you tell I’m excited? I’M REALLY EXCITED!!!_

_I’m sending a photo that I took of Pabu with this letter. I figured since he misses Naga a bunch, then she probably misses him, too, so you can give this picture to Naga so she’ll feel a little less lonely._

_Next time you write to me, I’ll be working for Kuvira!! Tell your parents and Katara I say hi!_

_Love, Bolin (Nuktuk, Hero of the South!) and Pabu (Juji, Nuktuk’s Faithful Snow Raccoon Companion)_

**_———_ **

Korra’s not getting better.

She’s getting more hours of sleep than she ever has in her life. She’s eating as much of her mother’s cooking as she can bring herself to bear. She’s working with Katara, trying to walk, falling on her face every time. Spending hours in freezing cold water while Katara tries to heal her, but nothing’s working.

The Avatar is broken.

She meditates. Some days, she rises with the sun, and sits there, stone-still, until it gets dark again. She doesn’t really have much else to do, and clearing her mind helps, because…because she has so much to think about.

Asami is working with Varrick at her company. Mako is back on the force. Bolin is helping rebuild the Earth Kingdom. The Air Nation is becoming whole again.

And Korra is here, at the bottom of the world, doing _nothing._ She’s supposed to be _stronger_ than this. She’s supposed to be able to _fight_ this, get back up on her feet like nothing ever happened.

But something did happen, and Korra doesn’t know how to fix it.

She can barely even _bend._

She can feel, deep in her soul, that the world is caught between two battles. There’s a threat looming on the horizon, stronger the longer she stays here being useless, and Korra is supposed to stop it. She’s the Avatar, and it’s her job.

But the Avatar is broken.

She misses her friends more than anything. The letters are great, but they’re also torture. Knowing that everyone else is all together, helping people, and Korra is at home, feeling worthless and insignificant, is killing her. She misses Mako, and she misses Bolin, and she misses Asami. Asami, who writes to her more than anyone else. Asami, who tells her everything. Asami, who once dated Mako, just like Korra did.

When Korra had read about Asami’s bust with Mako, she’d felt a strong surge of _jealousy_ ripple throughout her body. Even now, when she thinks about it, her teeth clench of their own accord. Asami had assured her that everything had been platonic, and nothing romantic had happened at all, but Korra had still felt. Korra still feels it.

She doesn’t get it. She thought she was _over_ Mako. It doesn’t make sense.

Nothing does. Especially the fact that she only ever writes back to Asami, and no one else.

“Korra, are you ready to try again?” Katara asks her, and Korra sets her jaw and wheels herself over to the bar. It doesn’t matter how hard she tries, though.

Because the Avatar is broken.

**———**

_Dear Korra,_

_You seemed a little…more down than usual in your last letter. I really wish I could be there for you in person, but I just can’t leave the city…so, I decided I’d find a ridiculous story to tell you to cheer you up._

_Luckily, when you work with Varrick, funny stories come in truckloads. I mean, this one wasn’t so funny when it happened, because then I was mostly just breathing deep and trying not to shout at him (and Zhu Li was probably feeling the same, to be perfectly honest). But in hindsight? Yeah, this was pretty hilarious._

_Do you remember that husband and wife business duo that I told you about, the Zhangs? The ones who wanted to invest in Varrick’s new spirit vine project. Well, they came over for dinner tonight, and I went because A, moral support, and B, Varrick decided to invite people over to_ _my_ house _without telling me._

 _The problem with these two is that they were_ _total_ _snobs. I know a lot of rich people are, but I guess I’ve gotten so used to being around Varrick that I was a little surprised at how proper the Zhangs were. And they weren’t even the funny and agreeable kind of proper, either. They were kind of…pretentious. And rude. I mean, if you had been there, I don’t know if you’d have been able to control yourself._

_They spent a whole hour complaining about how the chairs were too soft, and how the food wasn’t hot enough, and that my dining room looked nothing how they expected, and I had to sit there with a big, fake smile on my face and pretend that I didn’t want to grab my glove and shock them both to sleep. Finally (it was probably an hour and a half in, but it felt like seven), Varrick brought up the business deal._

_You could tell that they only cared about the money, because they stopped looking bored and instead started acting all excited. So they heard Varrick out while he went on and on about the spirit vines, and their energy, and what sort of machines he’d build with them, and how he’d use them to help humanity and all, this big, ridiculous monologue. I thought it was over the top, and this is_ _Varrick_ _we’re talking about, so you can’t imagine what it was like._

_So after a good fifteen minutes of Varrick talking, he told them he actually prepared a prototype to demonstrate for them. And Zhu Li gave him this weird gun-thing that sort of looked like a megaphone, with this tiny glass cylinder at the top with a little baby spirit vine sprout inside it, and he held it up, shouted, “AIRBENDING!” and blasted this huge gust of wind across the table that sent the Zhangs’ bowls of dessert right into their faces._

_They left in a huff, told Varrick they didn’t want any part of his deal, and told me that they’d never do business with my company (so I really dodged a bullet, then). Zhu Li was looking angrier than I’ve ever seen her, and I was about to blow my lid, and then Varrick told me that he’d never wanted to make the deal with them anyway, because he’s already signed on with Kuvira and she doesn’t want him sharing his spirit vine ideas with anyone else. And when I asked him why he invited them to dinner and didn’t just tell them no, he told me that he’d overheard them badmouthing Future Industries, and wanted to get back at them._

_It’s weird. I used to hate Varrick after what he did to me, and then I thought we were only business partners. But now it’s like we’re sort of friends? I don’t know, but it’s kinda nice._

_Varrick and Zhu Li leave for the Earth Kingdom colonies tomorrow, along with Bolin. I’m going to miss them a lot. I’ve gotten used to them always being around, and now I’ll be alone again._

_I’m working on some new mech-suits, though, so I guess those will keep me occupied. And Varrick said he’d give me some of the profits from the spirit vine stuff, which is really awesome of him. I could do a lot with that money._

_Well, it’s getting pretty late, and I kind of had a lot of wine at dinner to distract myself from the Zhangs, so I’m sorry if my handwriting looks bad. I should really get to bed._

_I found these dog biscuits at the market the other day, so I’m sending them down. I’m not totally sure what’s in them, but it’s some vegetarian brand from Omashu. I have no idea if Naga will like them or not, but I figured she might like to at least try them. Put a little variety in her palate._

_The only way this night could have been better is if you were to here to laugh at the_ _Zhangs and Varrick with me. I miss your laugh; it always makes me smile._

_\- Asami_

_Dear Korra,_

_I imagine this will be a fairly long letter, as everyone in the family wanted to say something. For that, I apologize in advance._

_Hey, Korra, it’s Pema. How are you feeling? I hope you’re all right. Things are still pretty good up here on Air Temple Island. Tenzin and Jinora are working hard with all of the airbenders, and you wouldn’t believe how good they’re all getting! I wish you could be here to see it, Korra, it’s amazing, even if I’m still one of the only non-benders around. Oh, well. Rohan still hasn’t shown any signs of bending anything yet (and I apologize for the bean curd stains, I was feeding him dinner)._

_Speaking of, Rohan’s a lot more vocal now! He keeps asking for you, at least, we_ think _he’s saying your name. He says “Korga,” and we’re pretty sure it means you. He isn’t the only one who misses you, either._

_Wish your parents and Katara well for me. And I hope you liked the care package I sent, because I’m thinking of making it a weekly thing. :)_

_Korra!!!!!!!!!! It’s Ikki!!!!!!! What’s up???? I’m having SO much fun at home! We have new airbending suits, with little glider-wing-thingies under the arms, and it’s like FLYING!! You HAVE to try one!_

_Today was fun. I got up earlier than Meelo, so I could blow him out of bed. It’s ok, Korra, I’m allowed to do it because he did it to ME yesterday (except he didn’t use wind. YUCK!) Then for breakfast I had some of Mom’s sticky buns, and they were SOOOOOOOO GOOD. Then we had airbending training all day, I was totally better than Meelo all the way, and I think I was even better than Uncle Bumi! (But don’t tell him I said that) Then I played airball with Ryu and Ying for a really long time, and then I bothered Jinora for a little bit, because all she does is meditate and talk to spirits and write to KAI. So I stole the letters that Kai sent her, and I’m gonna read them. MWAHAHAHA! (That’s my evil laugh, do you like it?)_

_When are you coming back Korra? When? When? When? Soon, right? I hope so!! I really miss you, Korra, I reaaaaaaaallllllyyyyy miss you!!! Please come back to Republic City soon! Please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please!!!!! Ok. I have to let Meelo write now. Ugh. He’s so GROSS._

_BOW DOWN TO MEELO, KING OF THE WORLD, RULER OF ALL THE UNIVURSE, AND EMPEROR OF PULLING PEOPLE’S GUTS OUT OF THEIR NOSES._

_That’s my new titel! Does it sound good??? I lik it._

_If Ikki told u that she is the best airbender, then she is RONG becuz it is ME!! and you can tell EVRYONE that becuz it’s TRU. No one is better at airbending then i am_

_Mom and DAd say to ask u how you r feeling, but I feel lik your probaly getting tired of that_ _kwest_ _quast_ _QUESCHUN. I’m here to ask you the REAL things, like have u batteled any spirits??? and is Gran Gran secretly evul and taking all you’re power??????_

_Please don’t tell her i said that tho, she’ll get rilly mad at me._

_Life in Republick Sity is GRATE but I wish you were here >:((( ur so cool Kora >:((( here have some more angery smiley faces >:((((((( they r shaming u >:(((((((( FEEL ASHAMD >:(((((((((_

_Everyone rilly misses you, and i miss u the MOST DUH but sometims I think Asami misses u More. She always rites to you, and she gets so ecksited when one of your letters comes in!!!!! i think they make her happee_

_EWWWWW jinoora is making me giv her the pen becuz SHE wants to writ >:((( now the angery smiley faces are shamming HER >:((((((((((((( I HAT U JINOORA >:(((((((((((((((((_

_ok Poki says hi to!!! bye kora, i miss yu!!!!!!!!!!_

_Dear Korra,_

_Sorry about Ikki and Meelo, they’re being pests as usual. Sometimes, it’s hard for me to believe that I’m even related to them, they can be_ _so_ _ridiculous._

_I hope you’re feeling ok down at the South Pole. I bet Gran-Gran is helping you a lot. At least, I hope so. She is the best healer in the world, right?_

_There’s a lot going on up here. What with airbender training and everything happening with the Earth Kingdom, we’ve all got pretty full plates. I don’t know everything about Kuvira and her plans, mostly because Dad won’t tell me, and I think that’s_ _so_ _unfair. I’m thirteen years old, I have my tattoos, and I teach the airbenders all the time! Probably even more than Dad does, since he’s always so busy with work on the city and stuff. I’m perfectly eligible to hear what’s going on, so why can’t he just_ _tell_ _me?_

 _Kai suggested that we sneak outside the dining room while Mom and Dad and Chief Beifong are talking and listen in on their conversation. I think we’re going to try that next time he comes to the island, because Dad definitely isn’t going to be telling me anything any time soon, and I_ _have_ _to know._

 _Kai and I are…I mean, I guess we’re…dating. Sorry, it’s super embarrassing to write about, and Mom keeps shooting him scary glares whenever he’s here, but I’m_ _dating_ _Kai_ _, so I don’t care._

 _Ew, that sounded so…like, totally something that_ _Ikki_ _would say if_ _she_ _were dating a boy, or something._

 _I_ _am_ _really excited about it, though. It’s so totally humiliating to write about. I would rather tell it to you in person. I miss being able to talk to you about boys. You told me about Mako, and I want to tell you about Kai._

 _That’s just the thing. You’re so much more_ _mature_ _than any of my siblings. I can’t talk to Ikki and Meelo about stuff like this. They’d just make fun of me._

_But I did actually want to write something important here._

_The spirits are restless. I can feel it. I’m guessing you can feel it, too. This doesn’t feel like peace, it feels like we’re caught in between two wars, and the second one is just building power. Zaheer and the Red Lotus were bad, but this…this feels worse._

_Maybe I’m making things up. Maybe it’s just aftershock left over from last time. But the world just doesn’t feel_ _balanced_ _right now. I thought that, after Amon and the Equalists, and Unalaq and Vaatu, and the Red Lotus and the new airbenders, that the world could be back to normal again, but…I don’t think it is._

 _You_ _can_ _feel this, too, right? It’s not just me?_

_Well, anyway…I guess we just have to see what happens. There’s not much else we can do about it._

_…I just looked up at Ikki’s part of the letter and read that she stole my letters from Kai??? I’ll write you again soon, Korra, I just have to go MURDER my sister._

_Korra,_

_How are you? How’s Mom? How is the healing process going?_

_The Air Nation is stronger than ever, I’m sure you’ll be happy to hear. Someday, you’ll come and see them. They would love to see you. I’ve told the story of you defeating Amon using nothing but airbending more times than I can count, but I think everyone would rather hear it firsthand from you._

_All cheerfulness aside; I’m sure you know that the world is on the brink of grave danger. I can sense it. You can sense it. Jinora can sense it. There’s something coming, and we’re pretty sure that something is Kuvira._

_Now, I know Tonraq has been keeping you updated on everything happening with the reunification of the Earth Kingdom, and that Asami is probably filling in any other details in her letters that she comes across, but the fact remains that we’re going to be in trouble. We’re_ _already_ _in trouble. In my meditations, and from what I’ve heard from Jinora, I gather that the spirits know it, too, and that it’s only a matter of time before something happens._

 _Korra, I know you need time. I know you’re still healing. I know this process takes as long as it takes, and I applaud you for sticking with it and persevering throughout all the hardships. But Kuvira is_ _dangerous;_ _she has Baatar Jr. and Varrick with her, both brilliant minds, and the full power of an entire army, with technological knowhow and incredible metalbending talent to boot. We don’t know what will happen, but Lin is pretty sure Kuvira is going mad with power, and Suyin seems to agree._

 _Nothing has happened yet, and for all we know, it might never happen. But it could, and we have to be prepared for when it does._ _You_ _have to be prepared. I hate to put the pressure on you, I really do, but the world needs its Avatar, Korra. We can last for a while without you, but we need the powerhouse who defeated Amon, Unalaq, and Zaheer. We need that Avatar back, and we need her soon._

_I’m writing to my mother to go over your healing and exercise regiment. Whatever works best and gets you in admirable shape the fastest will be the way to go._

_I truly am sorry, Korra, for expecting this of you. I know you’ve been through a lot. And more than anything, even if you never heal completely at all, we’d all just like to_ see _you around Republic City again. Doing good for the world. Helping people._

_We love you, Korra, and we’re going to need you back very soon._

_Tenzin_

_Pema (and Rohan, too!)_

_Ikki!!!!_

_MEELO, KING OF THE WORLD, RULER OF ALL THE UNIVURSE, AND EMPEROR OF PULLING PEOPLE’S GUTS OUT OF THEIR NOSES_

_Jinora_

_Dear Korra,_

_I can’t lie, I’ve been…I’ve been thinking of visiting my father._

_I know. I know he’s awful, I know he was an Equalist, I_ _know_ _he betrayed me, and any trust or love I could have ever had for him is gone, but…he’s still my_ _father._ _He’s still my family, and I know I need to see him eventually. I can’t keep putting it off forever. It’s just a question of when to visit the first time._

_He’s been sending me letters for years. Ever since he was arrested, I’ve been getting at least one letter a week from him. I’ve never opened any of them. When I find them in my mail, I throw them out, or burn them in the fireplace, if I’m feeling particularly angry. What could he even have to say to me that he could fit into four years worth of letters? Is prison really that interesting? Is he just constantly apologizing to me, over and over again? It’s not like I’m going to forgive him. There’s no way I’ll ever be able to do that._

_But…it was the fifteenth anniversary of my mother dying last week. And I got about three more letters than I normally do from him, just like I always do this time of year._

_I miss her, Korra. I miss her, and part of me, this part of me that I’m so ashamed of, misses him, too._

_I don’t know why I’m telling you this. I haven’t told anyone else. I planned on keeping it a secret, but…you’re my friend. I wanted you to know. And it’s easier, not just to write it instead of say it out loud, but it’s easier to say it to_ _you._ _You make things less hard to say._

_I visited her grave. Last week, I visited her grave, like I do every year. I put flowers there. Water lilies, her favorite. And I sort of just…sat there. All day. And talked. I probably looked crazy, talking to a headstone, but in the moment I didn’t give a shit. I needed for her to hear me._

_I tell her things every year, and this year I told her all about Kuvira, and Varrick, and Bolin, and Mako, and Zhu Li, and the airbenders, and my company, and you, and you, and you, Korra. I think she likes to hear about you. Maybe it sounds insane, but I almost feel like I can sense her_ _spirit_ _every time I talk to her, and I definitely felt something there last week. It took me so long to write to you about it because I was scared to open up. Part of me still is._

_I don’t know if I’ll visit prison or not. I don’t know if I can take it. What do you think? You don’t have to answer._

_I’m sorry for dumping all this on you. It’s not your emotional baggage to carry. I just…I had to tell_ _someone._ _If it had to be anyone, I’m glad it was you, Korra._

_Hopefully, my next letter will be much happier. I’ll try and do something nice so I can tell you all about it._

_\- Asami_

_Dear Korra,_

_Sorry this letter’s sort of late. You know we usually try to send something when the rest of the family does, but_ _someone_ _(*cough* Tenzin *cough*) neglected to tell us they were writing to you a couple of weeks ago._

_Oh, this is Kya, by the way. And technically Bumi, too. I’m writing, though, because Bumi’s too lazy to bother._

_To be honest, we don’t really have much to tell you in terms of world affairs and all. Kuvira’s sort of laying low for the time being, but we’re all waiting for the moment when she pulls out something much fucking worse than anything before. We thought Suyin trained her well, but she might have trained her a little_ _too_ _well._

 _As for us? Bumi’s been working hard with airbending training, and it’s_ _totally_ _not going to his head_ _at all_ _. Oh, and he says Bum-Ju says hi. At least, I_ _think_ _that’s what he’s saying, his mouth is sort of stuffed with noodles at the moment._

_I guess we should ask: How’s Mom? We really miss her. You should tell her that, or she’ll keep sending us vaguely passive-agressive-slash-condescending letters about how we don’t talk to her enough. Tell her we’ll come down and visit once things cool off for a bit. Also tell her that Tenzin is still super annoying, and we are definitely the better children._

_Just kidding. ;)_

_To tell you the truth, Korra, things are actually kind of dull up here for a waterbender. I get enough practice in on the island, and there are always plenty of newbie airbenders to patch up so I can work on my healing, but business is pretty slow. I could use some action. I’m getting sick of sitting around doing nothing._

_I guess you understand that, huh? I’m sorry._

_Bumi says that he wants to spar with you as soon as you come back, and that he’ll totally win this time, no question. I told him that’s some wishful fucking thinking, but he doesn’t seem to care. I guess you’ll just have to take him up on his offer. Kick his ass._

_You’re old enough to drink, right? Yeah. We’re sending down a bottle of the good spirits, from the lower districts. You probably shouldn’t tell your parents. Or_ _our_ _parent. That might be even worse. But hopefully this bottle can help take the edge off things. We know it must be pretty stressful down there._

_Don’t drink it all at once._

_Love from Kya & Bumi_

_Dear Korra,_

_Well, I think you were right. Kuvira has officially lost all of her marbles, and Bolin and Varrick have been_ _totally_ _brainwashed._

 _Their last couple of letters have seemed so cheerful, so opposite everything else. It’s like they’re living in their own little bubble, and have no idea how_ _crazy_ _Kuvira really is. I don’t know how to convince them otherwise…and I sort of feel like Bolin and Opal’s relationship might suffer because of it._

 _Sigh. I just don’t know how anything is going to work out. Everything’s so…up in the air right now, you know? No one knows anything, and I feel like we’re just teetering on the edge of…_ _something_ _._

 _And now Tenzin is saying that Zaheer wants to talk to you. I know. I can’t believe it either. I’ll never understand why we didn’t just_ _get rid of him_ _when we had the chance, but…_

 _No one expects you to talk to him. He’s crazy, Korra, he’s_ _crazy_ _, and he hurt you, and in my opinion, you don’t need to go anywhere near him ever again._

 _I’m sorry that this letter is so short. I’m just so_ _scatter-brained_ _right now, I can hardly concentrate. I think I need to go to bed. I think I’ll feel better when I sleep._

_Hey, maybe I’ll see you in my dreams or something. I’ll keep an eye out for you._

_Love, Asami_

**_———_ **

The bottle of spirits lasts Korra maybe a week before it becomes tragically empty. She’d tried to make it last, tried to ration it off by only drinking a few sips a day, but yesterday had been rough. She’d thought she was about to make a breakthrough with Katara, and she’d been so sure, only to fall flat on her face once again and make a complete fool of herself. After that, she’d grabbed Kya and Bumi’s bottle from out of the swaddle of furs in her drawer she’d kept it wrapped in, and drank the whole thing until she passed out.

Katara says that she’s making progress. That, with a few more weeks worth of effort, Korra will be on her feet again.

Korra finds that hard to believe. And now she has nothing to numb it all with, not unless she wants to go outside and stick her head in a snowdrift. Maybe she will, just to feel _something._

She appreciates that everyone writes to her, but she often feels as if none of them understand. It’s good to hear from Kya, but no matter how bored she is up in Republic City, at least she’s still near all the action. Jinora complains about her siblings, but Korra would kill to see Ikki and Meelo again. And Tenzin’s letters are probably worst of all, because while Korra loves him, and will always trust his judgement, him telling her that she needs to speed up the recovery process isn’t exactly helping.

And then there’s Asami. Asami, the only person Korra bothers to write back to, Asami, who used to sign all of her letters with simply her name, and has suddenly started tacking a “love” right before it. Why did she change her closing? Is she angry with Korra? Did Korra do something to offend her, and Asami’s only just started to forgive her for it? Is she still mad about Korra stealing Mako from her, even if it was years and years ago that it happened?

But no, Asami had said that she didn’t care about Mako anymore. And, really, neither does Korra, not in the way that she once did.

They're only a couple of words. They shouldn’t be making Korra feel this confused…Some of her other friends say “love” at the ends of their letters, like Bolin, and it doesn’t mean anything _then…_

Maybe it has something to do with the way Korra’s heart starts beating faster whenever another of Asami’s letters comes in. Maybe it has to do with the way her face feels warm and her stomach twists and turns when she reads the words Asami has to say, even when they’re not about her. Maybe it has to do with the way Korra smiles, the way she misses, the way she dreams…

_Love, Asami,_ floats in and out of her brain constantly, pushing everything out until it’s the only thing left.

_Fuck._

And all this Kuvira business is just making Korra feel worse. Jinora is right: something’s coming, and it’s coming soon, and Korra _needs_ to be there, she _has_ to be ready, not because Tenzin tells her to be, and not because it’s what’s expected of her as the Avatar, but because it’s what she expects of _herself._ She can’t keep going the way she’s been going. She has to _heal._

But the healing isn’t working, and all Korra can do is read her friends’ letters, try and fail to fix her broken body with Katara, and hope Kya and Bumi will send her another bottle of the strong stuff sooner rather than later.

**———**

_To our cousin Korra,_

_We apologize for not writing sooner. Things are just so busy up here in the Northern Water Tribe. Chiefdom is_ _such_ _a bore, you have no idea._

_We’re not going to ask you how you’re feeling, because we know you’re probably not doing well, and we also don’t entirely care. It’s nothing personal, we just don’t ask anyone that. It’s a pretty false question, when you think about it. No one ever gives a truthful answer._

_When you get the chance, you really should come visit us. Things can get very dull up here, much duller than when we didn’t have to worry about running a nation, and we would…appreciate your company. Yes, we know, it’s better for us to be in charge, considering our father was completely insane and possessed by an evil spirit of darkness, but it’s just so much_ _work._

 _We know you know all about Kuvira and all the deranged things she’s done. Honestly, she makes_ _us_ _look well-adjusted. We’ve had to sit through all these absolutely_ _endless_ _meetings with other leaders of the world, with everyone from Fire Lord Izumi to the chief of Whale-Tail Island. Not much going on down there, I can tell you…_

_This is a slightly degrading question, but have you heard anything from Bolin? I (that is to say, Eska) was wondering if there’s any news of my former betrothed. If he has a new girlfriend, will you smack him for me next time you see him?_

_I’m joking. It’s a joke. See, I know how to do those. Haha._

_Anyway. This letter is brief, as we have hardly enough time to spare for trivial things like this. We wish you well and hope you will recover soon, and that you will come to the North Pole and take over as chief while we vacation to Ember Island. That sounds completely fair to us._

_Regretfully,_

_Eska and Desna, Chiefs of the Northern Water Tribe_

_P.S. I was only sort of joking about the Bolin thing. You can hit him if you want._

_Dear Korra,_

_Happy birthday! You’re twenty, and that’s pretty crazy, don’t you think? Kind of hard to believe that we’ve known each other for three years already._

_There are three things I’ve sent down with this letter, and they are as follows:_

_A sapphire bead bracelet. I saw it in a shop uptown a few weeks ago, and the jewels reminded me of your eyes. I know it’s a little fancy and posh, so I understand if you don’t want to wear it, haha. I guess you can think of it as sort of like a friendship bracelet? Except, I don’t have one to match, so maybe it isn’t like a friendship bracelet at all…well, whatever, it looks nice, the colors would go well with the blue of your eyes, and I thought you might like it._

_Another box of those Omashu dog treats for Naga. Technically, this isn’t really a gift for_ _you,_ _but I didn’t want to leave my girl hanging, and I remember how you said she liked them before. I was surprised, to be honest. Who knew Earth Kingdom vegans could create something that appeals so much to Water Tribe polar bear-dogs? Anyway, tell Naga that I love her and I miss her while you feed her these._

_And the photo album. I worked hard on this one, and I think it’s my favorite out of the three. I sent letters to basically everyone I know, asking for any photos that they had of you in action or with people you know. And I got a lot of great ones! Obviously, you’ll be able to see if you open the book, but there’s quite a few pictures in there (check out the one of you and Tahno on page 24. He actually sent that to me himself!). My personal faves being the one of you, Mako, and Bolin after the Fire Ferrets won the championship, and the one of us at the racetrack, the first time I showed you around the place. I don’t remember who took that one, but I do remember it being a fun day._

_I hope you like the presents, Korra. And I’m sure you’re getting tons more from everybody else, too. I hope you wear the bracelet and think of me. I hope you smile while you feed Naga those treats. I hope you look at the pictures in that book and feel a little less alone._

_If it were in any way possible, I would come down and spend your birthday with you. And I really,_ _really_ _wish that I could, Korra. You mean more to me than Future Industries ever will, but I just can’t leave my company right now, no matter how much I want to._

 _You probably think that this will be a super miserable birthday, but_ _I_ _think that if you really try at it, you can still have fun. You_ _will_ _still have fun._

_Here’s to a lifespan as long as Avatar Kyoshi’s._

_Love, Asami_

_P.S. I’ll make sure Kya and Bumi send you enough bottles to last you a while (though you really should take it easy on that stuff!). :)_

**_— — —_ **

There’s this photo, in the album Asami sent her, and Korra can’t stop staring at it.

All of the pictures in the book are nice to look at, making Korra feel just a little bit lighter every time she does. The one of Jinora right after she got her tattoos. The one of Mako and Lin Beifong, looking professional and busy at work. The one of Bolin and Varrick behind the scenes of one of the _Nuktuk_ movers _,_ the one of Opal and Su sparring with each other, and the one that Zuko sent in, of him and Aang and Sokka and Katara and Toph and Suki, that makes Korra feel a strong emotion that she can’t quite name.

But there’s this one, on the same page as a picture of Tenzin and Korra after she mastered airbending, this one of Asami, that Korra can’t seem to tear her eyes away from. In the photo, Asami’s staring out of a window at Air Temple Island, and the camera is catching her in a naturally peaceful state, a perfect candid. Her hair is fluttering slightly in the breeze, and her elbow is propped up on the windowsill, hand holding up her chin, her red, red lips parted ever so slightly. She looks calm and tranquil, and very, _very_ beautiful.

Out of all of the photos in the album, Korra looks at that one the most, and it hurts her more than the others do, because she wants to see Asami so badly that it’s painful to think about, and she thinks about it a lot.

She looks at the pictures. She feeds Naga the treats. She wears the bracelet, and when the cold, pale South Pole sunlight hits the glass beads and the sapphires, Korra lets herself look, even if it makes her eyes water and forces temporary spots to dance around her vision.

Sometimes she gets so frustrated, she just goes out into the snow and bends until she’s close to passing out. She tears open the earth, hurls icicle after icicle into the snow drifts, melts a long, narrow hole into the ground, summons a winter storm. Or, she tries to. Her bending’s still weak, patchy, difficult to control, and she starts to feel tired and dizzy after only ten minutes or so of work. She doesn’t know why.

It makes her want to scream.

At least she can walk now. At least she can get to her feet in the morning and walk to the bathroom, instead of having to haul herself into the stupid, uncomfortable, straight-backed wheelchair and have someone push her carefully across the ice to Katara’s hut.

But her legs still ache, her thighs still feel a little shaky, her knees tremble, and she still can’t walk for long. Because even if she’s conquered one thing, Korra will never be truly free from the things Zaheer did to her.

She’s started seeing things. She catches glimpses of herself, visions of a darker Korra, leering sinisterly at her, eyes glowing with the power of Raava, the power of the Avatar State, wrists and ankles still bound with manacles, chains trailing limply after her as she lurches and grins. That’s when Korra’s body burns, and her hands shake, and she has to force herself to breathe until the thing goes away. Sometimes it works.

Sometimes it doesn’t.

And she hasn’t told Asami about the visions, and she isn’t sure why. Probably because she’s supposed to be healing. She’s supposed to be stronger than this. She’s afraid she’s going insane. Probably that’s why.

There is one thing that Korra is sure of, though. She thinks she’s known it for a while, but has only just been able to admit it to herself.

And she can _never_ tell Asami this. No matter what Asami’s letters say about Korra’s eyes, and how much Asami misses her, and her dreams, and her fucking _Love, Asamis,_ she isn’t saying them to Korra’s face. Not really.

And that hurts deeper than it should, when compared to everything else Korra has been through.

**— — —**

_To Avatar Korra,_

_Hey, kid! I heard it was your birthday a few weeks back! How you feeling, big number twenty?_

_I’m doing great! Kuvira and Baatar Jr. have got me working day and night, but it’s ok! I like it! Keeps my blood flowing and my brain busy, you know what I mean? And if I don’t get my brain busy, well, then I can’t keep doing all the things I do! And we all know the world needs me to keep doing those things!_

_Now, I’m not really supposed to tell you what I’ve been working on, but for you I figured I could make an exception. I mean, you’re the Avatar, for crying out loud!_ _The Avatar!_ _If anyone deserves to know all the whosey-whatz-its of the world, it’s you, and I don’t care_ _what_ _Kuvira says about it!_

_So here it is: You remember the spirit vines that showed up all around the city after you battled that crazy dark spirit UnaVaatu? The ones that totally almost destroyed Republic City and got me and Zhu Li out of jail? You know what I’m talking about! Well, we’ve collected some sample clippings of those vines, and we’re gonna harness the spirit energy inside them to help power all our new machinery!_

_Kuvira keeps talking about using the power for weaponry and lasers and stuff, but we’ll see about that yet. Small steps first, kid, always the small steps first, and then the big stuff, your bombs and your death weapons and your what-have-yous! Not that we necessarily need any of those, but just in case!_

_I just wish you could see the Earth Kingdom now, kid, you’d love it! Everything’s all unified, and fixed, and the people are loving Kuvira’s work! And who wouldn’t? She knows exactly what she’s doing! Your pal Bolin and I are doing a lot of good things, and we know you’d help if you could (and we really wish you could!)!_

_Well, I’d better get going. Gotta get my full ten hours of beauty rest before it’s back to work tomorrow!_

_Feel better soon, kid, and happy birthday._

_Sincerely, Varrick!_

_P.S. Hi, Avatar Korra. This is Zhu Li. Varrick dictated to me what he wanted to say to you so I could write it down, but when he was done, I wasn’t sure where I could put what_ _I_ _wanted to say, so that’s why I made this little postscript. Sorry, I know we’ve never really spoken before (you probably barely even remember who I am), but I felt like I had to say…something. I couldn’t just send Varrick’s letter and be done with it. I just wanted you to know that I think you’re an incredible Avatar, and I hope you feel better soon. Everyone would really love to see you get back up on your feet. Happy birthday._

_\- Zhu Li_

_Korra,_

_I’m going to be blunt. No one else seems to want to ask you, but we’re all worried, and so I figured_ _I’d_ _ask, because I know that no one else will. Why don’t you write back to anyone? Your friends, your family, they’ve all been writing to you for years, and you haven’t responded to a single letter. Why the hell not? I understand if it’s hard, but kid, we_ _care_ _about you. Don’t leave us hanging._

_The Sato girl says you write back to her, and that’s good. Now, can’t you extend that courtesy to the rest of us?_

_Aside from that, the pressure is building up, Korra. Kuvira has gone way too far, farther than any of us thought she would (or could), and I have a feeling it’s all going to turn very nasty very soon. None of us expected this of her, least of all my sister, but Suyin’s been wrong before. Kuvira is bad news, and we have no way of knowing what her plans could be. You’ve got to come back to the city, kid, and do something about this._

_Speaking of Su…I guess you’re probably wondering how we’re doing, huh? Well, we’re…fine. Better. Not great, but…better. At least, we’re not getting into metalbending duels or anything like that. Not anymore._

_I haven’t been to Zaofu in a while, though. I haven’t really had the time. The police force has been real busy lately, what with the surge of new gang activity since a lot of criminals got airbending after Harmonic Convergence. Plus, there’s the added strain of Kuvira supporters all around the city, and we’ve got enough without them as it is. There was an incident last week where a couple of Kuvira people burned down a shop, and we still haven’t been able to track down who did it._

_And I’m sure Mako’s already told you, but we’ve had to sign him on to guard Prince Wu of the Earth Kingdom. He’s supposed to have his coronation in six months or so, and I’m pretty sure Mako wants to rip his head off. Come to think of it, I’m pretty sure_ _I_ _want to rip his head off, too, but I think that the royal officials would probably frown upon that. He’s just a pain, and he’ll probably be a terrible ruler, but it’s what the Earth Kingdom needs right now. When you finally decide to write back to Mako, tell him to quit his whining, and that he’s staying on as Wu’s bodyguard at least until the coronation, and there’s no use complaining about it because I ain’t changing my mind._

_I’ve run out of things to say. Not that it matters. You probably won’t send a letter back to me, will you?_

_Come on, kid. Write back to us. Tell us how you’re doing. All we get is news from Tonraq and Senna. We need it from you._

_Chief Lin Beifong_

_Dear Avatar Korra,_

_I’ve been debating on whether or not to send this letter the past couple of months, or really, the past couple of years, and I figured now was the time to do it. I apologize, as it should have been sooner._

_I know we don’t know each other particularly well, but I knew Aang. They were one of the best friends I could have ever asked for. And so I figured, why not write to you? You were them once, and they’re you, and you’re the same person, just different._

_I’m sure you’ve had enough of people wanting to know how you are. You’re probably frustrated with everyone constantly asking you that same question, over and over again. I know I was, after I was banished from home and my uncle would never stop asking me how I was feeling. I was never feeling well, and it doesn’t seem that you are, either. But we’re a little similar, Korra, at least,_ _I_ _think we are, and having my Uncle Iroh care for me was a gift. Your friends and family are gifts, too. Remember that._

_You’ve probably also had enough of everyone telling you about Kuvira, and the state of the world. I understand why you would be. I’m not going to tell you to hurry up and come back to us, but I am going to tell you heal. No matter how long it takes._

_I’m probably boring you. You don’t need to listen to an old man prattle on. I used to hate Uncle’s lectures. Now, I miss them more than anything (along with Aang and Sokka, of course)._

_I think I wanted this letter to be a reassurance to you, though. To tell you to take your time. That the world can go on without the Avatar for a little while longer. That it’s not your fault, and someday, you’ll be more powerful than the rest of us put together._

_There was a time when Aang was injured, too. After my sister’s lightning hit them, the Avatar state was almost broken. I know you know that. But it took Aang a long while to recover, too, just like you are now, and when they finally did, they were strong enough to take down the Fire Lord. They were only thirteen, so think of what you could be capable of as a fully grown adult._

_After this whole Kuvira business is over and done with, I’d like to invite you to tea with me and Uncle in the spirit world. I know he’d love to see you again._

_Stay strong. I know you can._

_\- Zuko_

_P.S. Oh, and tell Katara hello from me. If she finds out that I was writing to you and didn’t wish her well, she’ll come up here to the Fire Nation herself and chop my head off with an icicle or something._

**— — —**

“You know,” Katara says over dinner one night, after a day Korra’s spent meditating and drinking and bending until she drops. “I think you might be well enough now to return to the city.”

Dad grins. Mom says, “Oh, Korra, that’s so exciting!”

Korra just blinks. “Really?”

Katara nods, smiling. “Really.”

“Oh,” Korra says. She tries for a winning smile. “That’s great.”

In the corner of the room, her shadow self shuffles slightly, eyes glowing a blinding white.

Going home is everything Korra has wanted for years, and now the thought of actually doing it makes her stomach churn. The thought of seeing everyone after so long, of being expected to do something about Kuvira, of everyone’s crestfallen faces when they realize that she’s still just as useless as she was before, of seeing Asami now that she knows that she’s so deeply in love with her, it makes her chest physically ache.

And Asami hasn’t written in…at least two months. Korra doesn’t know why. Katara sends a letter to Tenzin, telling him that Korra’s coming back, and Korra gets messages from almost all of her friends, telling her that they’re excited, that they can’t wait to see her. Even though they know Korra won’t reply to them, they all send something.

But not Asami. Asami, whose letters have been so constant for three straight years, sends nothing.

Korra doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. The whole thing’s just so _stupid._ Did she say something that offended Asami without even realizing it? God, Korra _can’t_ lose Asami, she fucking _can’t,_ if she doesn’t have Asami, she’ll…

She doesn’t know. She doesn’t really know anything anymore.

She doesn’t even open the envelopes from everyone else, she just uses her mediocre firepower to reduce them to ashes.

“Don’t worry,” she tells Naga. “I’ll see you soon.”

She doesn’t exactly know _when_ she’ll see Naga again, but she knows she will. If anyone can find her (wherever she’s going), Naga can.

Because she’s not planning on going back to Republic City. She’s going somewhere else. She doesn’t know where, but it won’t be back to Tenzin and Mako and Bolin and _Asami._ She’ll lie low for a bit. Improve on herself. Find somebody to spar with, and do it until she’s back to normal, back to how she was before Zaheer ruined her body with poison and almost killed her.

For whatever reason, she sails all the way to Republic City’s harbor, even though she knows she won’t dock there. Maybe she’s proving something to herself. Maybe she’s hoping for a glimpse of something special.

But all she sees is the Dark Avatar, perched on top of Aang’s statue, bound in chains, staring her down, so she turns around and sets sail for somewhere else.

Anywhere else.

**— — —**

_Dear Korra,_

_God, I’m so sorry I didn’t write for so long. I know you’re probably wondering where all my letters went. I just…_

_I got really busy with the company. And I had to spend a lot of nights working. I’ve barely had time for anything else. And when I wasn’t working, I was going to business meetings, and I when I wasn’t doing_ _that_ _, I was going to important luncheons and dinners, and when I wasn’t doing any of those things, I was sleeping. I know, I know, it isn’t a very good excuse, and I should have tried to make more time for you, but my brain was scattered all over the place, and I could never focus for long enough._

_And I realized something. Something about you. And I wasn’t expecting it, so it kind of caught me off guard, and I didn’t know what to say to you about it. I still don’t, not really. It’s nothing bad (I don’t think), but I think I need to tell it to you in person._

_I’m really sorry, Korra. I really should have found the time to write to you._

_Well…I hope you didn’t miss me_ _too_ _much. And I hope you got enough letters from everyone else to make up for the lack of mine._

_Anyway, I’m so excited that you’re coming home soon! Has it really been almost three years? That’s so crazy…it feels more like fifty, and at the same time, it feels like no time has passed at all._

_What should I do when I see you? I think Bolin might cry. I’ll try not to cry, but it might happen anyway. I’ve just missed you so much, Korra. You have no idea._

_But maybe you do._

_Pema’s planning a party for you. It may or may not be a surprise party. If it isn’t, then great! If it is, forget you heard it from me. :)_

_I know we don’t know_ _exactly_ _when you’ll be home by, but I’ve got my fingers crossed that it’s soon. After three years, I’m not sure how much longer I can last without you around, haha._

_Let me know, will you? If you find out. I need to mark the date on my calendar with sparkles or glitter or something._

_And I really hope you’re not mad at me, about the letters. If you are…well, I’m sorry. I know I’ve already said that, but I’ll say it again, and maybe it’ll mean something._

_I can’t wait to see you._

_Love, Asami_

_Dear Korra,_

_If the silence after the sending of my last letter (and the letter before that, and the letter before that, etc.) and my sister’s words are any indication, you aren’t going to respond to this._

_But you know me. I figured I’d give it a try anyways._

_Zaofu is in trouble. More accurately, I think the_ _world_ _is in trouble. My most trusted advisor has turned against me and everything else she once stood for, and she’s dragged my eldest son into it, too. I don’t like that Kuvira does the things that she does, but I’ve tried to stop her, to discourage her from going too far, and I’m afraid that I might be too late._

 _Kuvira is traveling the Earth Kingdom (or, what once_ _was_ _the Earth Kingdom, anyway), along with Varrick and Bolin. She claims to be doing what’s best for the people, going to each town and offering up troops to occupy the villages to protect from bandits and other unwanted invaders, but it’s obvious there’s some nasty tricks up her sleeve. She’s just looking to gain as much power as possible over as much ground as possible, and if I know Kuvira and her ambition, she’s going to stop at absolutely_ _nothing_ _to get what she wants._

 _Opal and some of the other airbenders have been dispatched to keep an eye on these towns, defend them and see if they can swing the people in their favor before Kuvira gets there. Unfortunately, it seems that no matter_ _what_ _they do, Kuvira gets to everyone in the end. I suspect bribery, and possibly threats._

 _Additionally, I think this whole Kuvira situation is really throwing a wrench in Opal’s relationship with Bolin. There’s no way to tell how_ _that_ _will turn out._

 _There’s no way to tell how_ _anything_ _will turn out. Everything is just so confusing now. I’m sure you know what that’s like. We don’t know what to do to stop Kuvira without starting an all-out war, and every day I find it hard to fall asleep, for fear of her troops showing up on Zaofu’s doorstep in the middle of the night. I know she’s after my city, I’ve known this since she left it, and I know she no longer cares for me enough to show even the slightest shred of hesitation._

_I can only hope that Baatar Jr. can influence her to show some restraint, but my son (though I love him) can be a fool. There’s no telling what he will or will not do. He seems to be pretty strongly under Kuvira’s spell._

_I can’t help feeling that this is my fault, or at least, part of it, Kuvira was my protégé, and maybe I failed her in my teachings, and didn’t do as well as I could have done as her mentor. Lin says that’s crazy talk, but I don’t know._

_Korra. I’m glad to hear you’re coming home. The world has been so empty without you in it. And I know you’re the strongest one around, out of any of us. Kuvira won’t know what hit her._

_Hugs and kisses from Suyin Beifong_

_Avatar Korra,_

_Tenzin has told me of your upcoming return to Republic City now that you are healed and fully back to normal. This is splendid news! In the nearly three years that you’ve been gone, many things have happened in the world, and we have much to discuss with each other._

_I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye, but I would prefer to put all of that behind us. The past is past, and we have new things to be concerned with._

_I trust your friends and family have been keeping you updated on the goings on of the Earth Kingdom, and that you probably have a lot to say on the matter of Kuvira. We will go over everything upon your arrival, and decide upon the most ideal course of action. Determining howbest to move forward and approach this whole Earth Kingdom reunification debacle is of the utmost importance, and I hope that we can come to an agreement between the two of us._

_Now, as I understand, you have not begun your journey from the South Pole just yet. Truly, why wait? I know that you prefer to be a part of the action, and the sooner you get here, the sooner we can return to the way things were before. Republic City_ _needs_ _you, Avatar Korra. Your_ _world_ _needs you. I don’t see how sitting around at the bottom of the earth while you are in perfect health is going to fulfill either of those needs._

_I write this letter to ask you with the utmost urgency to return as soon as you possibly can. We’ve stayed afloat without you these past years, but our time is running short, and Kuvira grows more powerful by the day. Though we aren’t entirely sure of her plans yet, I fear she may be one of the largest threats our world has ever faced._

_When you arrive at Republic City, we will discuss everything further. I do_ _hope_ _that you start your journey soon._

_Sincerely, President Raiko_

_Dear Korra,_

_Ok, I get it. You’re mad at me. That’s why you’re not responding to my letters, right? Because I didn’t write to you for so long?_

_It’s ok. I would be mad at me, too. That was really stupid of me._

_But I don’t know how else to tell you that I’m sorry. When you get to the City, we’ll talk, ok? And maybe I can make things better then, if you’ll hear me out (which I hope you will)._

_You are coming back soon, right? I’m not trying to rush you, not at all, that’s the last thing I want to do, I think you should come back when you’re ready and feeling good about it, not when other people tell you to. But Katara made it sound like it would be soon, and it’s been about a month since she sent her letter…_

_Just…you can’t stay mad at me forever, Korra. That would be childish. I know you like to hold grudges, but…don’t hold this one against me. I don’t think it’s worth it._

_Write back to me. Or don’t. Just come home soon. I miss you too much._

_Love, Asami_

_Dear Korra,_

_Your dad just came into port tonight, and he says that you were supposed to be here six months ago. Where are you, Korra? I knew you couldn’t stay mad at me for that long. You weren’t even getting my letters at all._

_Are you safe? God, please tell me you’re safe, Korra. Tell me you’re not hurt. Or kidnapped. Or…I don’t want to think about it. I’m so nervous, that I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know why I’m writing this letter._

_Everyone here is so worried. Your family and Katara really thought that you’d been here for half a year, and we really thought the same about you being at home. Can you just…even if you don’t write back, can you give us some sort of_ _sign_ _that you’re ok? I don’t know how long I can go without knowing._

_Tenzin and the others just told me that you never answered any of their letters. Why did you only write back to me, Korra? Why won’t you write to me now?_

_I keep saying this, because I don’t know what else to say, but_ _please_ _be ok. Please, please, please._

_Please, Korra._

_I’m sending this with a messenger hawk that I rented. Maybe this way my letter can find you._

_Please get it. Please don’t be hurt. Please. I miss you._

_Love, Asami_

_Dear Korra,_

_Please get this letter. I keep sending them and sending them, and none of them seem to reach you._

_Please still be_ _alive_ _to get this letter. My hawk keeps coming back empty-handed, and it doesn’t seem like she’s seen anyone along the way._

_I…I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do. God, I’m so scared, Korra. Come home to me. Come home to us._

_Please. Korra. I miss you. I_ _need_ _you. I love you._

 _I love you, Korra. Not in the way I’m supposed to, as your friend. In the way I want to. The way I think I was_ _meant_ _to. I love you. I love you. I need you to know how much I do. I need you to come back. Come back. Please._ _Please._

_God, why am I even writing this? It’s not like you’re going to see it._

_Asami_

**Author's Note:**

> follow my [tumblr](https://connorswhisk.tumblr.com) @connorswhisk and my [twitter](https://twitter.com/connorswhisk) @ the same. i get up to stupid shit on my tumblr and get up to significantly less stupid shit on my twt, but a follower there would still be greatly appreciated, as i have very few


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